One Week to Go....

Still pregnant! I went to the Dr. yesterday and he tells me I'm 2 cm dilated, up from one last week. Based on the position of the head and the amount of back pain and contractions I've had the last few days, he says he'll be surprised if I make it till next week. Let's hope that he's right! Two nights ago, I slept terrible. I was up the whole night with contractions but nothing to write home about, just painful enough to wake me up a million times. Then last night, I slept great! I feel a million times better today than yesterday. The kids are happier too, must have something to do with mommy being less crabby!

I know it's hard on them having me slow impatient and irritable. They can't wait for the baby to come either. Carter asks several times each day, "When will the baby come out?!" which is sort of cute because I thought I was the impatient one. They're really excited. The other day Jeremy took Carter and Leah with him to get his haircut. They shared the chair next to his and talked to the girl the whole time. She asked if they had other brothers or sisters and Leah said yes. She then asked if it was a boy or girl and Leah said, "we don't know yet!". She kind of had a shocked look on her face, but Jeremy jumped right in to clarify that I was pregnant. I guess it was pretty funny.

I'm sticking with the 22nd as my prediction, which is tomorrow!

Here are some belly shots, taken by my photographer Carter.

Two weeks to go...

Other than having a much harder time sleeping and more back pain, not much has changed since last week. The Dr. said I'm a little more than 1cm, but he wouldn't call it 2.

Good news on the name front, I think we've finally nailed down a girl's name. I was getting really frustrated and tired of looking on-line. I've probably spent 15 hours on Nymbler and BabyNameWizard alone, not to even mention the book time. The other night, I prayed before bed that somehow we'd find the right name. That night I had a dream that woke me up, not all that uncommon lately. I couldn't fall back asleep and started to think about the name again and this name popped into my head right away. It's been there the whole time, but we ruled it out a while ago b/c we thought it was the name my sister-in-law was going to use if she has a girl (she's due end of March). So, I called her in the morning and double checked with her. And, we got the green light. She's already set on a different name. Either way, boy or girl, I think we're good! Who knew the name was going to be the biggest challenge, even harder than the heartburn this time.

I'm Gonna Miss This...

A friend emailed this to me. I often wish the time away too, mostly out of exhaustion, just to get to the end of the day. Reading this came at a good time, a needed reminder of how blessed I am to raise kids and love them. A little warning, you may want tissue on hand!

from the blog site www.mycharmingkids.net

I'm gonna miss this
"How do you do it? How do you stay so calm with four young children?"

Part of it is just how God made me, I think. I am pretty calm with my children. And, honestly, often I stay calm even in the midst of chaos because, frankly, it's better than the alternative. A shrieking, freaking out mama is not going to make an already stressful situation any better. So, for the most part, I stay calm and try to be in the moment with my children.

But how do I do it?

There is one little bit of inspiration that literally descended upon me almost two years ago, while I was holding Nuggey in the bathroom, that has completely revolutionized my parenting. When I keep this truth in mind, I find it as easy as apple pie to stay calm in the midst of toddler chaos.

I remember that I'm gonna miss this.

It was dark, during the end of bathtime, and Prince Charming was gone. I was doing dinner, baths and bedtime myself those days, as my husband worked late. It had been, undoubtedly, a long day with the kids. Big Mac was three, Nuggey was one and a half and Small Fry was a baby. It is as clear as day still, this memory.

I was sitting on the toilet, drying MckNugget off after his bath. Small Fry, unable to roll, was sprawled on the floor of the bathroom on some towels, wearing nothing but a diaper and a grimace. Big Mac was still in the tub. He was squawking to get out and Small Fry was bellyaching for attention. But I slowly wrapped Nuggey up in his towel, determined to stay calm, and cuddled him in terrycloth. I slowly rocked him back and forth in my arms and sang Rock-a-bye Baby to my second born.

As I wrapped up the song, I prepared to sit Nuggey up and attend to the chaos that was the other children. After all, there were baths to finish, teeth to brush, diapers to put on, jammies to find and beds to tuck children into. But as he sensed me about to right him, Nuggey tossed his wet head back in my arms and looked up at me. "Uh-gain!"

So I sang Rock-a-bye Baby one more time, but I told him it would be the last. Yet when I finished, he begged again for more.

I didn't want to do more. I didn't want to sing to him one more time. I was tired. Tired of children, tired of singing, tired of the day. I just wanted it to be over. But then suddenly, as if fairy dust was sprinkled from the heavens right onto my tired head, the entire reality of my future set in.

I'm gonna miss this.

I looked down at little Nuggey, his damp eyelashes long and dark batting at me, his tiny bottom cradled in my hand, his soft, chubby legs thrown over my arm, his body entirely dependent on mine as I held him in my lap, and I could see the future. Nuggey, a grown boy, sporting a football jersey and facial hair, walked out of the bathroom. It was going to happen, and soon. And while I knew there would be joys with that time in my life, when our young children are teenagers and beyond, it struck me like a ton of bricks.

When that time comes, I'm gonna miss this.

When Nuggey comes home from college, barely speaks a word to me and hibernates in his bedroom all summer, I'm gonna miss this. As my mind fast forwarded to the future, I knew that at that moment, I would give anything for 20 year old Nuggey to be a toddler again, just for one more hour, so I could rock him and sing while I stroked his wet head.

And here, years earlier, I was being given my wish. I was able to rock Nuggey, a nearly helpless babe in arms, one more time.

Given a new perspective from which to see, I sang Rock-a-bye Baby as many times as Nuggey would let me that night. Eventually Small Fry found her hands and started admiring them, and Big Mac grabbed a new tub toy. And I relished that time with my son in my arms, knowing that soon enough he would be all grown, and my arms would ache to hold him like a baby again.

I'm gonna miss this.

My mind cannot help but wander to those parents who have lost children. What on earth would they not give to hold their children again, even for a moment. I bet they would not complain about having to sing Rock-a-bye Baby one more time. Rather, they would probably give their right arm to sing it ten million times until their voice was hoarse and their eyelids closed in slumber.

And women with empty wombs who long and pray and ache for children? What honor am I doing them if I take for granted the fact that I have children, young children who are begging me to cuddle them, sing to them.

So, I determined right there and then in the bathroom to try to be ever thankful for the moments I do have with my children. I will not wish away their young years, always hoping to get more laundry done or other children dried off. I will relish each kiss, hug and song. I will leave their childhood behind with no regrets, no "I love you" unsaid, no cheek unkissed, no request to "Cuddle wif' me!" turned down. Even as the macaroni flies and the Sharpie stains my table, even when there are midnight wailers and globs of Desitin under my fingernails, I know...

...I know I'm gonna miss this.

3 Weeks to Go

I'm 37 weeks pregnant today and realized I haven't been posting much about the pregnancy thus far. It's really flown by and I've felt surprisingly good considering taking care Elliot, who is only 18 months, keeps me super busy. He's definitely the busiest of our kids thus far and the most demanding. Also, the most cuddliest and affectionate of our kids...not sure how that all comes together but we're so interested to see how he is as he gets older. Elliot is full of personality.

The baby seems great. I went in for a check-up today and I'm measuring on schedule and 1cm dilated thus far. I was a bit dissapointed thinking after the hectic schedule from Christmas that I might be farther along. He said to not be surprised if I stay this way until I go into labor. He said as you have more kids, you don't usually progress before labor begins. Then, it all happens quickly. So, we'll see.....my prediction is Jan. 22nd. The stressful part is the name. We have nailed down a boy's name (not telling though!). The girl's name is another story. It's just so hard this time. All the names we love keep getting ruled out for one reason or another. I'm hoping there's a name out there we just haven't come accross yet, but somehow will before the baby arrives. Or, that we'll have a boy and be set. Either way will be great. I just can't wait to meet him or her.

The room is ready and clothes are washed and put away. I bought diapers and a girl and boy take-home outfit. Just waiting for labor. We do have a few nights out planned up until the 16th. Then, our schedule is clear. So, it might be nice to get through some of that stuff first.

On a side note, yesterday Jeremy and I went out to dinner to celebrate our 7th anniversary. We went to dinner at a little restaurant near the bridge where we got engaged. It was cozy and quiet, just what we needed. The food was also great, carrot cake for desert. Then we made a few Christmas exchanges without having to tell any children to stop touching that and just look, don't touch. I think we spent a half hour in a men's clothing store, just looking around and joking around. On any other day, I would have been in and out in less than 5 minutes, hoping I ended up with the right item. We had a great time together, just the two of us! I'm one lucky lady.

Snow, Snow and more snow!!!

As I type, Carter and Leah are back out there in the winter wonderland. I'm watching from the window as Carter digs out the opening to the igloo he and Jeremy built yesterday. We've had three solid days of heavy snow, at least two feet and counting, probably closer to 3. It's supposed to continue till tonight sometime. I feel a little like Dr. Marvin in the movie "What about Bob?" standing by the window waiting for the storm to let up. Each time I say to the kids, "I think it's slowing down?!", the snow begins to dump on us again.

So, after two weeks off on break, the kids don't have school again today. The roads are horrible and I'm dying to get out!!! We've been in other than church yesterday morning. However, this has given me a chance to nest a bit. I got all the neutral baby clothes washed and put away. We hung several things on the walls yesterday and went through a bunch of old clothes. The dining room now hosts four boxes of odds and ends ready for donation. If I could just get out of the house in order to unload it all!! Perhaps it will let up this afternoon. I'd like to hit Kohls and grab a boy and girl newborn outfit for the trip home from the hospital. I always purchase one of each and then return what we don't have. My mom washes the outfit while I'm in the hospital and brings it to me at some point during our stay.

Back to the blizzard....Here are some shots from yesterday.

Carter and Jeremy built an igloo. They first made a base, then added wood across the top for a roof, put a tarp over and then more snow.

Then, Leah joined them

Later, they went out again, this time Elliot went too. Jeremy had to hold him most of the time b/c the snow was too deep for him to move around. Leah loved the igloo. She said it was all warm and cozy inside and asked if she could sleep in it....so adventurous!

Carter, climbing into the igloo.

You can see how deep the snow got compared to Leah and Carter.

Jeremy climbing out of the igloo

I stayed in all day for fear of falling and it's freezing cold!! So, all pics are through a window. By tomorrow, we should be able to leave the nest.

Christmas 2009

Merry Christmas!! Just a re-cap of the week of Christmas festivities. I meant to post more often, but I'm lumping it all together at this point. It flew by. Jeremy was home from Tuesday afternoon through the weekend. We were able to spend a lot of time with family on both sides and still attempted to hang out just the 5 of us here and there. Jeremy's friend Troy brought his two cousins, Mollie and Abbie to town the day after Christmas. They then tailgated on Sunday for the Browns game and headed back to Columbus that night. Sunday was also our 7th wedding anniversary. We plan to celebrate this Wed. by going out to dinner. It's just easier to wait till after the holidays, plus we have a better chance of getting a sitter that way!

So, here are some shots from Christmas week....

Christmas Party at Mom's Pop's Tots - the playgroup at church.

Carter asking Santa for a remote control plane

Leah asked for a princess book

From the Christmas party, I took the kids to mail their letters to Santa in town.

Birthday party for Mike, Jeremy's dad and Grandma. Their birthdays are on the 24th and 22nd. Jeremy and I had everyone for dinner and Grandma made a vanilla almond cake, per Mike's request. It was scrumptious!!

Anna with Kelly, who was home for the holidays from Tennessee

Jeremy with Kel

The kids were up super late and Leah ended up passing out in Kelly's lap around 9:30

Christmas Morning!!! Elliot is getting good with the wrapping paper.

Santa remembered!! A remote control helicopter and plane set. I think Jeremy is more excited about flying these around the house.

A few new books. Mom was getting tired of reading the same truck board books to Elliot!

Leah, sporting her purple polka dot shades.

This wheelbarrow was the most exciting gift. They played with it all morning and it continues to be a hit, transforming into whatever their imagination decides. Yesterday it was a mail truck and Carter was the mailman, delivering letters to Leah's home in the family room.

Merry Christmas!!!